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[ friday | 27 november 09 ]
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[ 11:56 ]
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horrible night of sleep last night. I thought it couldn't get worse than wednesday but it did. it's been like a week now that I haven't been sleeping very well.. waking up like a half dozen times (and only 1 or 2 of those for pee breaks), and every time I wake up my pillow is gone, slides off the end of the bed because I don't have my headboard up, so that's my fault, but whatever. I'd trade that any day for just being able to stay asleep for an entire night for once. if this keeps up after I move into my new place and put my entire bed together, then I'm gonna have to look into it. maybe it's just the mattress, I have had it for almost 13 years now. I wanna get one of those memory foam things but I think they're way expensive.
I have an interview on monday for something that's way over my head, and I'm supposed to wear a suit, which I don't have. I guess I'll have to call my uncle and see if he has something in my size. the only problem though is that I don't even have any shoes to go with it, and I doubt he wears a size 13 or even a 12. it's not like I'm gonna get a managerial position anyway, but I still need to try I guess. she actually said "if you have a suit, please wear it", so maybe they're expecting that not everyone owns one, but somehow I feel like I (or anyone) will automatically be disqualified as soon as they see somebody not wearing one.
current mood:  moody
current music: Sneaky Sound System - It's Not My Problem
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ saturday | 21 november 09 ]
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[ 10:43 ] · · · candle and cake day again
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hey look at that, just sitting here looking at my journal I noticed that today is the *yawn* 8th birthday of my journal. weeee let's celebrate. *yawn again*
I feel like I should say something pithy, but as usual I can't think of anything.
sometimes I feel like I wanna do music again, but every time I think about how much of a pain in the butt the studio setup is, it kinda kills my enthusiasm. plus music equipment is so damn expensive, even though right now I have enough to get by. I just feel like there's a lot more I wanna do with creating music, even if I'm the only one who's ever gonna hear it most likely. I feel like I can branch out into different genres of music, probably because I'm listening to the smooth jazz station a lot now to relax, but it sounds so easy to do. I could see myself doing like 2-3 different kinds of music. I think that would be cool to try.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ saturday | 14 november 09 ]
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[ 11:48 ]
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man this week went by so fast, it feels like last friday was just like 2-3 days ago. and as usual, no hope for a job in the near future, no phone calls, nothing. getting really sick and tired of this over and over for the last 6 years.
but at least one thing went ok. dentist appointment yesterday, and not only am I in great condition, to the point where they upgraded me from every 3 months to every 4 months, but my blood pressure has gone back down from ridiculous to borderline again. I know, not that thrilling, but when your life is as boring as mine you gotta grab on to any little thing you can get.
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[ 1 sanctimonious platitude || pontificate ]
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| [ thursday | 05 november 09 ]
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[ 16:48 ]
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nothing but headaches all day long. thank you Aleve for doing nothing about it. I thought it was from sitting in front of the TV and computer screen all day long*, but it kept up after I stopped and went to lunch. was fine while I was eating, but like 2 minutes after I was done, there it was again. and now here I am in front of the computer again, I'm sure that's not helping at all.
* = lost my job again. no surprise. they just finished a month earlier than expected. I know there's more stuff to do because we're only in the middle of the 2nd bank branch out of 3, but apparently they're thinking about changing their paperwork scanning mode, which they'll only need one person for, and I guess I didn't make the cut, out of 2 people. I bet money if the supervisor was there, it would be me still working instead of the other person. cuz I got along so much better with the other supervisor. I was labelled as "the man" more than once while I was there, and the other scanner person is kind of an old goody two shoes, the supervisor and I are close. oh well. whatever. they used the "if" statement trying to give me false hope that there might be more work again but they negated the "if" by saying they didn't know how long it was going to be, so I'm done holding my breath on that one. back to square one, broke and depressed. home sweet home.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ tuesday | 27 october 09 ]
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[ 17:17 ] · · · money for nothing
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my computer apparently thinks daylight saving time is over.
so anyway, I just got paid for an entire day of literally doing NOTHING at work. for the first time ever, I wasted an entire day and did not do a single thing related to work. long story, but we moved from one bank branch to another, and for some reason I still don't understand, we didn't take the notebook I was using. the HQ sent a "new" one and we took that one along instead. well, "new" wasn't new, it was just unused by us. so when we opened up the box, all that was in there was the notebook, no mouse, no cables, not even a damn power cord! how can you ship somebody a computer and not give them the power cord? are you kidding me? so I had to drive back to the other branch and get the power cord and mouse from my old notebook (which the supervisor gave me $10 in gas money for, so at least I got a free lunch today). then after going back and setting up the computer, we find out that the scanning program to use with the scanner doesn't work. there's a file missing. so by then it's lunch time and we're waiting for the IT dept. to call and screw around with the computer remotely to fix it. at 1:30 they get to work. the entire time I'm telling the supervisor what they should be doing and are not doing. at 4:00, after 2 1/2 hours, the remote IT person re-installs the program that was missing a file, something I said we should have done around 10:30 in the morning. you would think that would solve the problem, and if I was doing it, it would have, but he is totally clueless and sets up the wrong driver for the scanner. I'm sitting there trying in vain yelling at the computer which driver to install and he still doesn't know what he's doing. after almost 20 minutes he finally does it, but then doesn't reboot the computer which I knew had to be done to re-configure the scanner with the right driver. finally the supervisor called him and just told him to stop the session so we could use the computer ourselves. after that, I had it fixed and working in less than 5 minutes by myself.
I ended up telling the supervisor how useless the guy was, to which he agreed. we were both laughing the whole time, and I wondered why it took him 2 1/2 hours to figure out to re-install the software. that was the very first thing I thought when I saw that a file was missing. we could have fixed it ourselves and been on our way by 10:30 in the morning, but instead it wasn't fixed until almost 4:15. so I spent the whole day just sitting there waiting for them for 2 hours just to start, and then an additional 2 1/2+ hours for him to NOT figure it out and for us tell him to just give up.
I really need a drink.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ sunday | 25 october 09 ]
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[ 20:56 ]
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I think I have found my next place to live (again). everything about it is really cool, with the exception of the rent. I can afford it, assuming I have a job that pays the same as I make now, but it would be nice if they lowered it like 100 bucks. I'm kinda spoiled only having to play $515 a month now, but you get what you pay for, which is why I'm getting the hell out of here. the other place where I used to live back in '06-'07 was probably the best place I've lived in years, and the rent now is over $100 cheaper than back then, which is also about that much cheaper than this other place I just went to yesterday. that other place also spoiled me by having the most gigantic bathtub I've ever seen, it's literally like a jacuzzi, plus it's in the perfect location to just kick back and watch tv. I'm sure I'll never find another bedroom/bathroom setup like that anywhere again, let alone with a bathtub that big and relaxing. the only reason I don't wanna go back there is the place is way on the east side of town. I kinda like being right in the middle near the strip right now. easy access to both ends.
I don't know if a bathtub is a valid reason to decide where I wanna live. but I think I'm done checking out places, now that I have 2 good ones to choose from. I think what it comes down to is if this place I went to yesterday doesn't lower their rent by february when my lease is up, then I'm probably gonna go back to the other place on the east side. I doubt they will do that but at least I can hope. although I'm surprised that the other place lowered the rent that much, so I guess we'll see.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ wednesday | 21 october 09 ]
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[ 12:15 ] · · · al
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hey look at me typing a journal entry at work.. shame on me. no big deal, lunch in 15 minutes and not enough time to start another project so I get to just sit here. on saturday the other 2 people sat around for the entire last hour and did nothing while I was working, even though there was still stuff to be done that they could have easily split up and finished with time to spare. someday I'll get to do that, I'll even settle for as little as maybe 40 minutes.
just a little reminder to myself, if I forget to say anything on friday, at least I can get it in here.. happy 50th to Weird Al, still one of my all-time faves. so few people can do what he does so masterfully, proven in part by his multiple grammys, and still counting cuz it seems like for the last 10 years every time he releases an album he gets the comedy album of the year grammy. I wonder if he'll make it into the rock & roll hall of fame or the hollywood walk of fame. I think he might be close to the hollywood one but I'm not sure. one of only maybe 2 or 3 musical artists who can lift me up when I'm angry or depressed, and it works every time. there's something special about that because I'm not one of those light-switch mood swing people.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ sunday | 18 october 09 ]
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[ 22:52 ]
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slightly buzzed right now, only slightly. I'm a little disappointed that after 2 drinks (1 of them being a little stronger than I had intended because I'm not a bartender), I'm still totally lucid and hardly even light-headed. I went to the liquor store since it's practically right next to the grocery store. I almost got a couple more things than I did, but I figured $30 was enough to spend this time.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ saturday | 10 october 09 ]
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[ 19:27 ] · · · whining
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am I allowed to complain about having to work on saturdays? originally the temp agency said "no saturdays" for this job but we haven't had a single one off yet. almost got one this week, at first the supervisor said "we're not working on saturday this week", then like an hour later it was "well we're only working half a day", then another hour later it was "well we're only working till 3..." well, 8-3 is a full day, minus 1 hour. and I know, overtime, but still, nothing great about having the money if I don't have any time to enjoy it.
1 day off is NOT a weekend, it's more like just a coincidental holiday in the middle of a long week.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ thursday | 08 october 09 ]
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[ 20:57 ] · · · job of the year + album of the year (I'm too lazy to do 2 separate entries right now)
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man I am so lazy with posting on here lately. I guess I'll just give the main update..
well.. after reading my last couple entries, I just realized I never even mentioned that I got a (very) temporary job a couple weeks ago. so I guess I have 2 things to say. that being one of them.. the e-mail I got from the temp agency said "4-5 days", but later I found out (even before the temp agency did) that the e-mail from the company to the agency actually said approximately "45 days". so I'm still there now, and last week they said probably till the beginning of november, but then today I just heard probably into december. so I wouldn't say I'm golden, but maybe a slight tinge of bronze for now. (that's an olympic medal pun, not a tanning pun. thank you.) all I do is scan loan paperwork for banks that have been taken over by the FDIC. of course I got the crap scanner so I have to literally sit there and watch every piece of paper come out to make sure it doesn't suck in more than one sheet at a time. weeeeee. it's ok though.
so I grabbed The Listening, the debut album by Lights, who is some girl from Toronto, and I have to say it's damn good. not what I would normally listen to, but there's something about it. vocally, she sounds like an even younger version of Jewel, if that's possible, but she's like all electronic and no guitar, or very little. it's very poppy, not dance music, all short concise songs mostly 3 1/2 minutes or less. she's even popped up on the front page of myspace in those celebrity twitter-like blurbs, so she might be about to go big over here sometime. she's already had 3 songs on the Canadian Top 20 charts. and in yet another aberration, I think my fave song on the album is a slow song. so there it is. highly recommended by yours truly, and we all know how rewarding and scintillating my musical advice is.
current music: Lights - Quiet
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ monday | 21 september 09 ]
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[ 16:25 ] · · · tv stuff
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well, yesterday was basically a wasted day in my life. I woke up and my lower back hurt so bad I couldn't do anything. I know it's because of my stupid mattress. right where my lower back is there's a big dip so there's like no support there at all. I couldn't sit on the edge of my bed and put my shoes and socks on so I couldn't go out the whole day, I could barely lie down.. strangely the only thing that didn't hurt was when I was standing up, which seems like it should be the exact opposite.
I tried not to watch the Emmys last night but I still wanted to see who won a couple of categories, and as I figured, disappointments right across the board. basically almost a copy of the winners from last year in the big categories. boring. however, I am happy to discover that what I've been saying for the last 2 years has almost been proven.. that NBC would probably barely even exist anymore if it wasn't for 30 Rock. all of their shows that they brag about are at the bottom of the ratings, including 30 Rock, I don't know who the hell is continuing to think that this is a funny show or what the voters' obsession is with Alec Baldwin but it doesn't even deserve to be on the air anymore, let alone win anything, and the ratings back that up 100%.
anyway, at least there's some good stuff on tonight now that it's season premiere week. and I have to mention that the season premiere of Curb Your Enthusiasm last night looked very promising. last season sucked and I'm not exactly on the edge of my seat about the Seinfeld reunion (I hope Larry's not doing that just for the ratings), but so far it looks like this season will be pretty decent.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ thursday | 17 september 09 ]
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[ 12:29 ] · · · weirdness
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I'm sitting here reading my old journal entries from when I first started back in 2001/2002, and right at the same moment as I read the title "people are slipping away from me" came Elvis singing the words "slipping away" from "Burning Love". I've had that happen once or twice before, it's so weird, what are the odds of something like that happening... I think there's actually a term or phrase for that if I remember right.
man I sure complained about my job a lot in those old entries. of course I still do that, when I actually have a job, but not as much as back then. a lot of whining and bitching going on.
I haven't mentioned this, and I asked my mom whether or not she wanted me to, and she didn't give me an answer, so I will anyway, just for something to say. I've been going back and forth on whether or not to even bother mentioning when I go to a job interview but don't get the job, because I'm still in the same position back at square one and nothing has changed. so anyway, I had 2 job interviews last thursday, and obviously didn't get either one. the first one was a dispatcher position at Mandalay Bay, and while it would have been really cool to say I work at a 5-star hotel, the position looked awful. LOTS of responsibility, dealing with fire alarms, fire departments, police, security. the guy said the intense stuff like that is only about 5% of the job, but hundreds of times more important than the rest of it. I wasn't sure I'd be up for that much responsibility without panicking or anything, especially if I was the only person on the shift. so I'm very glad I didn't get that one.
the other one was a regular ol' data entry position at a health network, which also involved driving around to hospitals and training and supporting the staff at those places. sounded interesting but wasn't permanent. it was a grant-funded position, and of course I had to ask what that meant because I'm stupid. basically when the grant money runs out, the job goes bye-bye.
so as I said, back to the beginning and having no leads. life I love you. thank you for treating me so well.
current music: Stabbing Westward - Slipping Away (heh.. j/k not really listening to it)
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ tuesday | 15 september 09 ]
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[ 11:29 ]
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I knew the novelty of living in one room would wear off eventually, and it has. I've never lived in a studio before so I thought it might be cool, but really it's just kinda boring. I started looking for another place for when my lease is up in february. I figured I should probably get a head start since I'm usually picky about my living space. I'm only assuming since it's 5+ months in advance that I'll actually have a job by then and be able to afford something more than $500 a month. of course I've gone more than twice that without finding jobs before, in a better economy than this, and in a much more job-populated city. I've been discovering there are just too damn many of these "work from home and make $5000 a month!" websites out there, and their non-jobs are infecting all the normal job boards I'm looking at. it's really kind of disappointing to see something that looks so good like that, only to find out that it's one of those "jobs".
so anyway, I think I found the place I wanna live. I already took the tour even though I couldn't move there now, and I totally love it. the only problem which will keep me from getting in there, most likely forever, is that they only sell, they don't rent. the cheapest thing they have, which is actually really nice, is about $165K, which makes about a $1500 a month mortgage including the HOA fees, with the minimum down payment. so that's never gonna happen while I'm putt-putting along at $12 an hour. everything is perfect about the place though. they even allow dogs up to 80 lbs. instead of the cheap little 25 lb. max that most places have. oh well.
lately in the last few weeks or so I've found that I occasionally have minor trouble focusing on small words or close-up writing. I have to take like 5-10 seconds to adjust. I don't know if that's because of too many hours of staring at a monitor or just age or something else. probably the first one of those if I had to guess. I don't know if this means that glasses are in my future or what, but I don't really have a problem with it if that's what it comes to. maybe it'll add a new layer to my impassive personality.. heh
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ friday | 11 september 09 ]
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[ 18:59 ] · · · another one bites the dust
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I can now scratch Carrie off my fictional list of movies I have to see in my lifetime.. I only base the list on movies that have become notoriously overblown for some hyped-up reason or another, which is the only reason I watched 2001 a few weeks ago.
I have to say honestly, I would absolutely love to get all the people I hate into a room and do that.. I don't know if that makes me twisted or psychologically unsound or what, but there really are certain people who no longer need to be breathing my air on this planet. it's not really every person I hate, but I do have a list inside my head of people who have done something so wrong that they really should be relieved of their duty on this earth.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ saturday | 05 september 09 ]
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[ 14:48 ]
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every time I don't have a job and don't leave the house 5 days a week to go somewhere on a regular basis, I always lose track of what day it is. yesterday felt like saturday and today feels like sunday. and this is the worst possible time for a 3-day weekend. my worthless $187/week unemployment check gets stalled but all the automatic bill payments come out right on time. I'm almost $500 in the hole right now in my bank account. not enough gas in my car to go anywhere, pretty much out of food, probably by the middle of next week. so I'm basically a shut-in for who knows how many weeks till I get enough of those 187's to recover $500 worth of redness. yep, I love life.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ thursday | 03 september 09 ]
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[ 19:46 ]
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I had an outer space movie day today, watched 2001:A Space Odyssey (for the first time), and E.T. (not the first time). I've been thinking about the ending to 2001 ever since then. didn't get it. I got the "stargate" thing but didn't really get the whole hotel room/"star child" thing. well in any case I guess I have to watch 2010 now.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ thursday | 27 august 09 ]
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[ 15:19 ] · · · broth of me
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I guess now is as good a time as any to update (he says 2 1/2 weeks later)...
just a quick little anecdote here..
so I'm going over to the jacuzzi the other day to kick back, and I see 2 red things sitting on the bottom next to the drains but I couldn't tell what they were. I turned on the jets but by the time I got back over there, the bubbles had obscured my being able to see anything anymore. so I just sat there through the cycle and waited for the jets to go off so I could see what those things were. then as the bubbles cleared up, I saw them again, but still couldn't tell what they were, so I dove under and picked one up. they turned out to be carrots. someone threw 2 carrots into the jacuzzi (not entirely surprising though considering where I live in the 'don't go there at night' part of town).. I was sitting there in a big pot of boiling water with carrots in there for 1/2 hour.
ok so now that you're done with your hysterical fit of laughter over that story.. I guess to continue from the last entry where I said "I am now half-heartedly looking for a job again", well, I am now whole-heartedly looking for a job again seeing as how I am YET AGAIN out of a job. but this time I'm not gonna get all depressed and "I don't give a shit about life anymore" like I do every other time I lose a job, even if I did watch Boy Interrupted last night and kinda put me in that mood.. I am actually more angry at how and why I lost the job than I am depressed about losing it. I don't really wanna tell the entire story, but the reader's digest version is that somebody fabricated a story about me not doing my job and then ran to the dept. head with it and they ate it up. let's just say that fucking bitch Diana needs to be fired for pulling something like that, especially as high up in the dept. as she is, you would think she would actually be smart enough to know that you aren't supposed to do things like that, but apparently smart is one thing she is not. I should have figured that out when she told me "perception is reality" in the middle of another not-so-uplifting exchange of words. umm, yeah, perception is like the exact opposite of reality, it's just someone's idea of reality and really is not at all connected with what actually is real. but anyway, that's a story for another day. dumbshit. let's leave it at that. I love having the last word.
current mood:  calm
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[ 3 sanctimonious platitudes || pontificate ]
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| [ monday | 10 august 09 ]
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[ 12:17 ] · · · is anyone "switched" here?
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I am now half-heartedly looking for a job again, seeing as how the weeks off are becoming too frequent around here, plus they treat people like crap, as evidenced by several previous entries.
so I'm checking out some stuff online here, and I came across an attractive data entry position that I might want to apply for, until I come to a sentence that I don't quite understand.. "This role requires someone bright and switched." um.. ok. anyone know what that means? I have never heard "switched" used like that before, and if anything, it actually sounds like it means something kinda underhanded and shady if you ask me, but I'm clueless as to what they're talking about. I looked it up just to see if there was some adjective form of the word I didn't know about, but the only one I came across was the skateboarding term which I always thought was called goofy-footed, skating with the opposite foot than normal on the board (which is the way I've always skated).
I guess I'll skip applying for that one since I don't know what they're talking about. I wouldn't wanna get turned down and have the word get out that I'm not switched.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ monday | 03 august 09 ]
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[ 18:36 ] · · · restaurant review
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I finally went to the mexican food place I've been wanting to go to. I have to admit I was pulled in by their arrogant "Best Mexican Food in Vegas" sign. yes, I fell for it. I think I'm on the verge of coming to the conclusion that mexican restaurant food is all the same, aside from the division of actual sit-down restaurants from Roberto's type places. it was good, but how can you make enchiladas special? their salsa has a lot of garlic in it, which is nice, so at least that's something. the one thing I have to give them negative points for though is that their "enchilada sauce" tastes like tomato soup right out of the can. I don't mind that it's not spicy, but the fact that it tastes like Campbell's is a minus. overall it is good though, and it seems like there's a slight shortage of mexican restaurants in vegas, at least compared to san diego, but I'm guessing part of that is because we're not 1/2 hour from the actual country. I really wish Sombrero would come here, that's the only restaurant left from san diego that I miss here.
and you knew I'd complain about this again, because I always do. I said it once before but it bears repeating.. (actually I've said it twice before but then I couldn't quote the song) and I'm sure I'll say it again too, probably every time it happens...
why is it that, as soon as they put down the check, they completely ignore you like they're not obligated to serve you anymore? I'm still a customer until I get up and leave, and I certainly haven't filled in the tip amount yet. you can NEVER get a refill after they give you the check. pisses me off. and why is this such a universal thing? I don't understand how every restaurant considers that the end of the business relationship when you're still sitting there.
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[ pontificate ]
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| [ wednesday | 29 july 09 ]
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[ 18:40 ]
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it looks like we need a new entry here. but since the week is just moving along at a quiet, boring pace, I will say this...
I am being driven crazy by all the fucking gnats in my apt. the body count in the last week is up to 9 I think, and there are still at least 2 more buzzing around. and why the hell do they always have to get right in my face? I wouldn't mind it if they just wanna sit there on the wall or fly around in the closet or something, but everywhere I go, they have to be right in my face. sitting at the computer, lying on my bed watching TV, in the kitchen, there's one in my face. I'm getting really sick and tired of this.
news flash: a little more than 24 hours later and the kill count is now up to 15, and there's still at least one more hanging around. I think I got the one that's been in my face the whole time though. pissing. me. off.
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[ pontificate ]
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